im so drunk with asians
where?
always
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Randomize
