Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
