he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
The power of my boobs compel you
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
