If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
