in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize