Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I am one with the molecules
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
