I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
