so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
