Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
True college students do jello shots in the library
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
