dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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