she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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