I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
