my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
