You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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