There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
