dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
