It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Randomize