Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
