dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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