He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
