i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
