I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
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