It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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