What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
The air taste purple.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
