she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
