I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
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