im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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