How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
