Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
He is an equal opportunity slut.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
