Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
we should paint friendship bongs
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