Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
