Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
