Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
