Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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