??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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