Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I will be naked everywhere
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize