theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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