Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
