Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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