Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
