So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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