If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize