yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
