lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
