I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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