Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
