writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Randomize