I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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