I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
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