walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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